Have you ever played the Super Powers game? You know the one where you ask what super power you wish you had and why? I’ve lost count of the times I’ve played that game. When I was younger, it was always the same answer each time: I wanted the power to fly! Doesn’t really need an explanation because being able to just up and fly would be amazing. As I started getting older, I still wanted to fly but I also wanted the super power of Invisibility. Throughout my teenage years, I desperately wanted to be invisible. I had issues as a teenager, I wasn’t the most popular kid and I just never felt like I really truly fit in (I’m that person that really found myself and my groove in my twenties, not my teenage years), so I spent endless time as a teenager imagining how much fun my life would be if I was invisible. I’ll admit that I also wanted that power so that I could mess around with people (don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about because everyone has, at some point, wanted to be a fly on the wall and watch a situation unfold!).
The Super Powers game came back to me yesterday as I was sitting in the oncology ward with mum while she had her chemo session. After settling in for the session and talking to some of the nurses and patients I knew, I sat back and just looked around the room. It’s amazing what you see when you really stop and look. I discovered a “newbie” was in our midst; a first timer to the chemo sessions who was sitting stiffly back in her chair with a smile plastered on her face. Looked normal enough until you saw her eyes; the fear and uncertainty was shinning through. I went over and chatted to her, got her a drink and some food, answered some questions, then sat back down when the nurses came and got started on her treatment. So again I sat back and looked around and was just struck by the expressions on peoples faces. Some were completely at ease, some were nervous, some were in pain, some were faking sleep so that no one would talk to them, and some were just looking around trying to catch someone’s eye so they could chat. And watching all this, the question of super powers came to mind and I decided if I could have a super power at that moment, it would be the ability to read peoples thoughts. Sounds creepy, but let me explain.
Watching all the patients and their friends/family yesterday, I started to wonder what people were thinking. What was running through their minds as they sat there. There was a lady whose was supporting her husband and this poor man was in agony. Absolute, scream out loud, agony. And her face said it all: she was avoiding looking at him while holding his hand because she was trying to control her tears, she waas struggling. I’ve been there, so I had an idea of how she felt. But looking at the others, I couldn’t tell what they were thinking and I figured that if I knew, I could do something to help, whether it be distract them from what they’re thinking, or help put them at ease, encourage them. If you know what someone is thinking, you know how to approach them. Now, I’ve encouraged and supported people without knowing what they were thinking, but it would be nice to be more specific, don’t you think? Well, that’s what I think.
Call me weird, but it was something that was running around my mind all day yesterday because our biggest battles are in our minds. It’s the thoughts that run riot in your mind that play a large part in controlling your emotions and actions. And sometimes, we don’t talk about our thoughts because people may not understand, or they may think we’re weird, (I’m a little odd and I’m fine with that, so if you’re weird, own it baby!) whatever the reason, we tend to keep a lot of our thoughts in our head and try to rationalise them, or ignore them or whatever. Now, I will say that some thoughts need to stay in your head (I’ve been known to speak out loud at inappropriate times, doesn’t usually end well, but that’s a story for another blog) but some thoughts need to be addressed and spoken out. Especially if your thoughts lean towards the I’m not worthy etc, you need to talk those out because you are worthy and valuable and important, regardless of what others may have told you. And at your hardest and darkest times, it’s nice to have someone say the right thing, the supportive thing, and the thing you need to hear. Being a mind reader would make that a easier to do.
So if at any point you catch me looking at you intently, don’t be too alarmed, I’m just trying to read your thoughts…but on that note, what’s your Super Power wish??